Whimsy is…

Have you ever found yourself struggling against the world? When it seems like things are coming at you faster than you can duck, swerve or just plain get out of the way?

As I was reading over at KS Milkmaid today, I realized why everywhere I turned there was a new obstacle waiting.

I was bringing them with me!

It’s my own attitude that’s causing the problems. I’ve lost site of the goal. I let myself get distracted by money (or more realistically - the lack thereof) Instead of starting my day talking with God and prioritizing my day according to His goals, I have let myself think about money. Over and over and over again during the day.

This might not be a bad thing if God had not SPECIFICALLY told me NOT to. R.E.P.E.A.T.E.D.L.Y. He has made it more than abundantly clear that DH is to take care of those worries, I have enough on my plate.

But I want us to be successfuly and well respected in the community. I want people to see us and say “oh, there’s mr and mrs so and so. They own XYZ company” Not only do I want my husband to be successful and well respected. I want everyone to know it’s because of ME.

In doing so, I have neglected the things God HAS asked me to. (taking care of our home and family). This of course, has let to more eating out and just general wastefulness. Not a great thing when the cash flow is at a trickle huh?

So when Christina said,

“Wouldn’t you know it; yours truly begged and pleaded to sell the farm this week because I had long lost sight of the rewards for doing it.”

she might as well have kicked me under the table to get my attention. I had been doing some whining of my own. I didn’t know if I wanted to keep doing this if it’s going to be this hard. If we aren’t going to be more financially secure. If I’m not going to be getting some recognition!
I don’t want people to turn to me and say “So what do you do? Do you help any?” (But I will take some credit for biting my tongue and not yelling “HELP?!? I run the show. It would grind to a screeching halt without me” and launching into a complete account of my job description)
I want people to see and say “WOW! They really know how to work together to run a business”

Funny thing is, God never said that was my goal. It may very well happen, but it will be in addition to, not instead of, the real prize.

What is the real prize? You know I’m not even sure. But I do know it’s more about the reward of living an obedient life than society’s accolades.

Not to mention the thrill of seeing God provide just what we need, right when we need it. R.E.P.E.A.T.E.D.L.Y.